kung papatulan nya lang ako...

mangangalunya ako.



bwahahaha!!!

naks. pasintabi kay mikey... 'di naman nya 'to nababasa. dead ako.

ito'y isang HS-like crush lang naman... na may todong kilig hahaha! as in kilig to the bones. aaay ang landi!

wenongayon kung me girlfriend sya? may boyfriend naman ako! bwahahaha! pwede! hahaha dead talga ako kay mikey neto. bubugbugin ako nun hahahaha!

one more gift

if there's one more gift
i'd ask of You, Lord
it would be peace here on earth;
as gentle as Your children's laughter
all around, all around

your people have grown weary
of living in confusion
when will we realize
that neither heaven is at peace
when we live not in peace

grant me serenity within
for the confusions around
are mere reflections
of what's within
what's within me

when you come to think about it

sometimes, you are exerting way too much effort on something that's not really worth it. no matter how many times you scold yourself about not thinking about it too much, about not pouting about it too much, you become too helpless and rant about it after all... which is sooo wrong.

giving your all may not be right at all times. i believe in doing your best. but i've slightly modified this belief now that i learned and i guess i know better. now i know that you have to give your best to something that's really worth it, to something that's for a better cause. now i know that your effort is just wasted if exerted on the wrong things.

so whatever happened to "give you best and God will do the rest"? it still is true, only this time i know that i'll have to choose carefully where i will pour my energies. to be wise - is a lifetime hope. 26 years of my life has passed and i'm still in nursery level in this subject --> wisdom. learning it is a painful, and sometimes excruciating, process. sometimes it strips off all your ego, all your pride, and you swallow all that's bitter and sore.

realizations... you keep on having a good dose as you get older. ;) in the end, i hope all will be well.

tanong

sometimes i ask
is it too much to ask?
and then you ask
why do i ask?
nothing, just felt the urge to ask.
so i ask.

lame... all lame.

naisip ko lang...

i was watching tv patrol after dinner. there was news about a fire in a certain province - it involved the mayor's house and damaged millions worth of textile and stuff. and what's predictable was shown. the people said that there was only one fire truck in their area. had there been other fire trucks (that actually contained water, huh!) available, it wouldn't have been that bad.

and i thought, grabe naman... every time there's fire, there are complaints of inadequate fire trucks. there may be enough fire trucks, but there is just not enough water. sigh... problems we had from 10 or 20 or 30 years ago are still problems today... and will probably remain unsolved for the next couple of years? nakakalungkot naman.

the closest i could get to having a green thumb

i always wanted to grow herbs and plants back at home. i was dreaming of picking up basil leaves for a pasta dish, or rosemary and oregano for adobo, sage would be good too, green onions... the works. fresh herbs would be great! (instead of the bottled spices mccormick has to offer - mccormick is a dish saver though! lalo na't wala naman talaga akong herb garden hehe).

there's this quasi-veranda outside our room now and i also dream of having something lush outside. small flowering plants maybe, if not herbs. we were in ikea last saturday and there i found the perfect green living creatures - small plants with colors so vibrant! deep, deep green with small flowers as well. nice. really nice. but i thought, hey, do i even have a green thumb to begin with? i can't tell 'cause i haven't tried.

my lola ading and lola floring both have passion for the green life. lola floring used to take care of plants in pque and lola ading has this really wild array of plants and flowers, even fruits, in mindoro. really refreshing!

seems like i have the passion, but i don't have the will to even try. i didn't buy the plants in ikea. i thought it would be a shame if they died on my hands. shame and pity for the plants if i fail them. i don't know if i could have a dedication strong enough to make them happy. anak ba ito? hehe.

last saturday still, we had tepanyaki for dinner and we bought way too much toge. the washed up excess toge was left in the strainer by the sink. guess what? the following day, there was a sign of green life! and i was really happy seeing little fountains of leaves sprouting from the toge! and i felt a sense of attachment to the little sprouts and i watered them everyday for the past 5 days!

the day came when we had to use the strainer - that was yesterday. i transferred the sprouts of life into a paper plate and left it by the stove. i can't help it, i had to take a picture before it dies...



...after all, it's the closest i could get to having a green thumb. :) goodbye toge sprouts!