that feeling

when you wake up excited to go to the 930am mass... nuninuninu

when you take a bath and groom yourself... nuninuninu

when you feel happy because you are done preparing at 9am... nuninuninu

when you don't rush because you have 30 more minutes to go... nuninuninu

then you realize that the mass actually starts at 9am... nuninuninu

kablag! kaboom! *cold water splash!* late na pala ako! shaks!

mrs. bau the beloved

mrs. bautista was our world history teacher during 4th year hs. we fondly called her mrs. bau. she was also a guidance counselor. sounds "normal"? well, she was an elderly cancer survivor, she walked with crutches, didn't really need the money, but she taught anyway.

she said her salary wasn't even enough for her daily taxi rides to and from work - or should i call it passion in her case? she said she wanted to exert her last days making a difference. so selfless!

one rainy day, she was walking with a male teacher when she slipped on the wet floor. sir caught her but accidentally grabbed her breast. alarmed and ashamed, he immediately let go and so poor mrs. bau fell on the floor. sir apologized for grabbing her boob  and for letting her fall down.

mrs. bau, in pain, said, "bat mo ko binitawan?!? ok lang yun! sana sinalo mo na lang ako! medyas lang to o! o! o!" and she mashed the rolled medyas in her bra. hahaha! that was mrs. bau showing humor despite pain.

i didn't have much recollection of my world history, but i could never forget her stories of aliens, mines, her endearing pronunciation of machu picchu, papyrus, totem poles. and there was one story i super love... the day she walked without crutches after being summoned to walk by a healer priest. faith, sister!

mrs. bau died a few years ago. no doubt, she achieved her goal of making a difference. she did what she loved to do - educating her students. she did it the best way she can with no regard for suffering. 

how do i make a difference? 

how do i end indifference?

lessons learned on the crazy hazy situation

- apreciate. appreciate. appreciate the precious clean air. you'll never know when you'll have your last dose of it.

- give thanks for the wind's decision to change its course... but show compassion to people who live where the wind took the haze.

- i've known how to properly wear an N95 mask. sadly, it was a bit too late. i treaded outdoor when the haze was in a hazardous level. and my mask may have been a little loose.

- that we may have masked the smoky smell, but the dangerous micro particles still make it through the lungs - and they stick there! it's the same concept with the asthma inhalers. particles have to be tiny enough so they can reach the lungs. wonder how our lungs look like now and what the effects will be  a few years from now.

- that staples in your bag may change over time. i never thought that an N95 will be a mainstay in my bag. welcome to the family!

- cheap is different from practical. when you are practical, you don't endanger other people's lives. the opposite happens when you are cheap. you even cripple an entire country! why burn? why?

- checking the psi level every hour is essential.

- bau. it's always bau.

hazy afternoon with 2km visibility

the 730am sun di makaporma

not too obvious in the pic, but haze was terrible here! parang may nagsisiga na hindi ka makaiwas sa usok ng siga.

all windows and doors shut. suffocating.

the loose mask 

and one of the better days!

sir cab's electric blue pen

sir cab was my 2nd year HS araling panlipunan teacher. he was that and my super kaduper crush! i wasn't alone in this admiration. i was with tina and thecx. hala naming names! i now proclaim our group the "cabsters" hahaha!

sir cab had a deep voice, he was not tall, he was always very neat-looking. we also associated him with roderick paulate and it follows that the theme song is "together forever" ano ba yan!!!! hahaha!

the terms zoroastrianismo, nebuchadnezar were extra interesting because they were taught by sir cab. on pop quiz days, the usual conversation was:

sir cab: ok, kumuha na ng 1/4 piece of paper at ballpen

us (just trying to jest sir cab): sir, anong color ng pen?

sir cab: kahit ano. green, black, neon red, electric blue!

and then we all crack up... all the time!

we love sir cab! he could be brutal and mataray too. i failed to submit my project when my lola died. then i went to him to explain why.

me: sir, sorry po. hindi ko po nagawa yung project ko kasi po... kasi po... yung lola ko po... sniff...

sir: ano? namatay ang lola mo kaya wala kang project?!

i swear, i thought, "tinatarayan ba ko ni sir?" hahaha!

there was even a time that thecx and i followed him on his way home (walking distance from school). stalker mode! we just wanted to see where he lived! susme pati mga sampay ni sir nakita pa namin! when we saw the house from afar, thecx and i quickly walked away, laughing like crazy teens! i am not too proud of this moment.

i heard an old song last night and thought that maybe this was sir cab's inspiration for the electric blue pen...

"When the moon disappears forever

And the sun shines electric blue

And the mountains and trees tumble into the sea

To rest there for eternity

No matter what you do

I will still love you"

side note: parang ang martir naman ata ng kantang ito? talaga? no matter what?

ningas cogon adventures - getting physical

here i go again. venturing into another trip - while the excitement lasts! i'm doing aerobics! hahaha bagong bago ba #80s? i know the in thing now is yoga-ing, gym-ing, even simply jogging, but i know better than to engage to such activities. i don't have the de-ter-mi-ney-syen to keep going! give me a week and i'll "find other more important things to do" (read: tamaryok).

well, i should be proud. i'm on day 2 of my aerobics adventure. the "passion" started late last night when i pinched my... ehem... tummy baby fats. i wondered if i'll ever cease sporting a muffin top. then the first word that came to my mind was "aerobics". haha i don't know why.

well, my 12-minute aerobics is better than nothing at all.

well, we'll see tomorrow if the passion will still be there.

on sea waves and papa

my earliest memory of the beach was when papa took me to the sea shore near my lola's house in mindoro. i was probably 4 or 5 years old then. i couldn't remember much about that trip, or if it was indeed in mindoro, but that beach stroll was very vivid. i could still remember how, for the first time, the waves touched my feet. how i got scared of the strange moving water so i tightened my grip on papa's hand. i still remember feeling dizzy and disoriented as i stared at the water rushing back to the sea. then we walked along... all feelings replaced by awe and happiness... and i somehow learned to love the majestic sea.

to the man who first brought me to the beach, we shared quite a few father-daughter moments, but this is probably the best! happy birthday, mr. leny! i hope you are in a state of bliss now, just like what we shared on my first beach stroll. please watch over us. 

ps: ehm but please don't make paramdam. hehehe. we all know we are strong when dealing with problems, but not when it comes to mumus. 

fat brains

battle of the brains! how could we forget this show that aired during the 90s? the show was hosted by david celdran and it featured kids who fought using their fat brains hehe. parang quiz bee lang pero sosyal version because it's televised. i loved how david gave that look of disgust whenever a player pressed the buzzer too soon, or gave incorrect answers. if looks could kill!

even though not deliberately, i learned a lot from this show! it was fun to guess (most of the time that's what i did) and it was great to discover answers. i was not the pinapadala-sa-quiz-bee-student type but still i really enjoyed watching this show with my mom.

i wish we have more shows like this - shows that would encourage the viewers to learn. better than heavy drama shows, or shows about halimaws, or shows that subconsciously tell the undiscerning viewer that it's not ok to be dark-skinned or hunchback. otherwise, you would need magical intervention to be pretty and acceptable to others. the power of media!

then there was battle of the brainless... which was just unexplainable. hay.

home

i am coming home on august 8 to 18!

for the two-day holiday

for the plane fare sale

for the husband who scouted for the best deal... and for him not leaving until the booking was done

for the office schedule that cooperated

for the excitement

thank you!!! see you, my beloved country - the philippines! 

wow!

red

first real pedi in almost 3 years! 

while i am an advocate of diys, and we have complete mani/pedi paraphernalia at home, and i feel more at peace when i do it myself (because i don't get to pay a dime), i believe it's good to get pampered every once in a while too - even if it's just pedi. ang haba ng sentence! how sweet it is when someone else does the scrubbing, clipping, polishing for you! no strained back! you just sit back, relax, and see your toe nails transform from yucky to lady's feet. 

i like red polish! babaeng babae :) hahaha!

incidentally, red is the color of the day! this is us during ft time this morning, di sinasadyang nagbabaga ang mga damit. :p

the testament

i finally finished reading grisham's "the testament". i liked it because it is about:

- the just distribution of the world's goods

- a man's rise and fall in overcoming drugs and booze addiction

- and how he triumphs in the battle

- dengue - because i am a dengue survivor

- how beautiful corumba is and how exciting it would be to get there

- how you need to summon a lot of courage to survive the adventures

- how missionaries leave everything behind to evangelize

- and how all material things become superficial if you are called to serve

- friendships 

- dirty lies

- love and the absence of it

- beautiful souls and being stripped of worldly things

it made me think... if my father left me with billions, what would i do with the money? 

ps: while i was reading the book, i asked mike how it would end (he had read the book and i have no issues about spoilers). he said the lawyer and the daughter will

end up together. that is so NOT the ending! hahaha!

music and me

i like music! i am currently listening to rx and they have sad love songs on the playlist. ayan, mangilid-ngilid na ang luha ko. i like music and i like how it has the power to affect and move me.

if you ask me what type i like, i can't give an answer because i like them all! i know, so middle child-y. bilang mabilis mauto, just let me listen to a song and i'll learn to like it.

here are my musical eras:

- metal era - i grew up with an older brother who blasted our speakers with metal/heavy metal music. during the irc days, whenever chatmates ask what music i like, i say i like metal hahaha! one budding weirdo, they probably thought. metallica, pearl jam, guns n roses are most memorable.

- jazz era - and the likes of basia, swing out sisters, kenny g, eagles! i love love these! pamana ng ama kong mahilig din magpasabog ng speakers. whenever i iron my clothes, i really like to play this type. ewan bakit.

- emy fujita era - OMyG! this one is really crazy! on one night out during my early days here in sg, jan and i heard this music playing in a record bar. wow! like a vampire drawn to blood scent, we were attracted to the music. for weeks, emy's songs played on repeat as i sleep (shared a room with kuya then). until one

day, kuya couldn't take it anymore and (almost violently) asked me to stop playing this music while we sleep! hahaha! pasensya na! now i realized that this music, i feel, is an effective way to induce bowels. i know, so gross!

- 96.3 era - i don't know why i like the feeling of depression brought about by listening to sad music. during my teenage years, i don't remember having heartbreaks, but i liked the feeling of being heartbroken. the power of music!

- wave era - during college days, i was in love with the quiet storm aired by wave 89.1. tamang senti rin! 

- pa-cool era - about a year ago, i was addicted to checking out new songs, downloading them, and updating my iphone playlist so i could listen to new songs only. pa-cooool!

- worship songs era - ito... singing with all my might! naluluha pa! at minememorize ko pa ang lyrics! :)

there was also the cruisin' series era, nina/nyoy volante era, rnb era, dance music era, parokya era, madonna/mj era! lahat na!

wag lang sigurong country, death metal, jologs (wow define jologs!) music!

i am thankful

• that i have family members who are just there no matter what
• that i have a work that provides for my needs and occasional wants
• that i am living in a place that's just a 10-min-walk away from the mrt
• that i have food and drinks on my table
• that we are gifted with good health
• that i am surrounded with positive, cheerful people
• that i have friends celebrating the gift of life
• that God has always been good despite my unfaithfulness

batam city tour

last may 5-6, we had a get-away in batam, indonesia. this one is different because we did not visit a beach, but we went to batam city for a city tour, massage, and hotel stay. 

we boarded at the harbor front ferry terminal. it's a bit odd for the ferry to show the film titanic to the passengers. entertainment or horror? hahaha! umm, we are in a boat. titanic is a big boat... that sank.

we did not sink. hehe. we arrived at the sekupang, indonesia terminal at around 9am local time.

i know what a "city tour" means - you will go to some shops where they will lure, almost force, you to buy goods. this was what happened on a china trip some years ago! but ok, we went to the city tour anyway. no harm in trying :)

our tour guide was agun, a cool dude with a raspy voice and a lot of benta jokes (at least for me). i like him. he didn't force us to buy stuff. we went to a lot of shops that sold "grade a" fake bags and clothes. very reminiscent of greenhills or ever or waltermart in the philippines. at may grade grade pa talaga ang kapekean! hahaha!

we also went to food item shops. we bought luwak coffee (alamid coffee in the philippines), coffee beans that have been through the worst in life. hahaha!

we also visited a temple (apparently the biggest in batam). i wanted to try the incense thing, but mike was afraid we might do it the wrong way and we would look like fools. hehe ok, we stayed away from the incense and the kneelers.

there was also a "cultural show" where 2 male dancers performed while a band played some local musical instruments. i wish they showed more gusto while dancing, but mike said if you do the same thing day after day then you wouldn't be able to hide the boredom. ganun? come on dancers! energy! energy! you could do better than that! this is coming from a person who's always charged with energy day and night (sarcasm). then... the male dancers became perya performers when they started to remove husk from a coconut using their teeth, and when they started to eat fire, walk on fire, and eat bubog. peryatik! hats off to manongs! you did well!

lunch was good! i would like to believe they were authentic indonesian dishes. beef dish was very similar to our tapa if only it had more vinegar and salt. was yummy! kropek was superb hehehe! when i go places, i like to taste all the dishes so i just take a little bit of everything (menos empacho) so i could say, "i tasted em all!"

massage was next. agun taught us the phrases to mutter if you want to make the massage harder or softer. i had memory gap so i couldn't remember how to tell auntie to make it softer. i said, "soft" but auntie just chuckled and gave a hard massage anyway. hahaha! it was a bit brutal but i liked it! one of the best massages i've had.

we stayed harmoni one hotel. it was a very big hotel, a bit old but still ok. we loved our room and bathroom.

we had dinner at nagoya mall. another mall that's not even at par with our sm malls! hehehe. but the food is definitely cheap :) and that's what's great!

we capped the night with a glass of beer and a lot of fickle mindedness (mine) and finally hit the sack. it was a tiring day.

i wish we skipped the city tour on our first day and just enjoyed the facilities at the hotel. loved the pool! an afternoon dip would have been perfect. we ended up doing our hot dip after breakfast. hot because the sun was so out and about!

 i tried to use the bath tub too (and silently apologized to other people who don't have water to drink). it was very relaxing - my first bath tub experience. i wonder why i've never tried it before (again, apologies to the thirsty).

overall, it was a good (and cheap get-away). my thoughts:

• batam is very similar to the philippines... complete with sari-sari stores, turu-turo, ambiance that's very pinas-like.
• i wish they showcased more of the historical, cultural spots, museums instead of counterfeit goods shops.
• in batam, a liter of petrol is cheaper than a liter of mineral water. "why not drink petrol instead?" asked agun.
• we wanted to dare and ride their public transpo, but agun discouraged us for safety reasons. "don't play play!"
• i wish they don't allow smoking inside malls, hotels. God bless the children and other 2nd hand smokers.
• in batam it feels like you are a millionaire!
• would i recommend this tour to others? yes, but skip the city tour! just a relaxing stay in the hotel is worth it!

my amo looks like my papa

i like my amo :) he's a kind man. he knows his sh*t (makahiram lang ng phrase kay jj). he helps you with your sh*t too. he doesn't shout. he always smiles. and chuckles. diba ang bait?

during half day holidays, his advice is: when you see other people leaving, you could leave too. in fact, he scans the work area for people leaving the office and he gives us the go signal to leave :)

he knows how to listen. i've seen how he helped his team troubleshoot issues. mano-mano! he's the man!

he went to china last week. this is our pasalubong. corn shaped jelly candy/lollipop. it tastes like corn, but it's a bit weird. wala lang mairelate lang ang pasalubong. hahaha!

ang labo ng post ko haha. nga pala "my amo looks like my papa" ang title ko. yes, i am reminded of my papa always. payat and the features are very similar. papa is that you?

blessed be the zealous

at church, there was a couple sitting to my left. i will state a fact: they were singing out of tune. not a single tune right. at first i was distracted because of the tune. later on, distraction turned into admiration and i thought i would do anything just to be in their shoes during the entire duration of the mass. why?

- because they were singing with all their might!
- because they didn't care if they were in tune or not. all that mattered was their desire to worship and communicate and they aced it!
- because they were the beggar who gave a mere cent, but gave all that she had, and more!
- because not only were they zealous singers, they were also zealous in the responses. so admirable!

i bet our pal up there was very happy :)

tuyong paghihilod

dry body brushing - i first read about it years ago from a blog (forgot which one). the writer said it's good for the skin plus it helps to save water. i didn't get the concept then, so i ignored this gem info.

a few months ago, i read about it again from one of the glossy features that led me to this:

and then i knew that i had to get the body brush pwede rin namang buddy brush. ay ang corny. hahaha!

i heard that body shop and muji have body brushes. wasn't lucky enough to locate muji's so body shop it is. it's made of cactus thorns. i know it sounds harsh, and it IS harsh if you brush heavily. but if the strokes are right, you get better skin by exfoliation. not only that, you get better blood circulation. not only that, you get to save water! imagine, after the hilod, onting sabon and wisik wisik na lang! hahaha!

i'm not an expert, but i guess the keys are (based on what i've read):
- start brushing from the feet going up to the neck area
- do 5-8 light brush strokes per area
- always brush towards the lymph nodes. yes, those kulanis, baby!
- be faithful to your routine

now if i could only do the last item above. :)

chitchat aka satsatan

wednesday morning. i decided to get out of my candy crush addiction. candy crush, you don't possess me! hahaha!

instead of playing candy crush during my entire commute time, i opened fb and ym, scanned my friends list, and sent messages to my missed friends - hs, elem, lcg, spi, ubs, neighbors, relatives! it's a bonus if they are online and they reply back :) the feeling is so refreshing!

we are so fortunate we have this technology now. you only need to move your fingers and you could reconnect with your friends. why not take advantage, right? :) i now declare (most) mornings to be satsatan time with friends. go! keeping in touch is oh so fine!

one fine morning

it was a beautiful day. i was in our home in sto. niño. mike was in their home in cavite. i decided to go outside and take a nap at our american (or was he swiss?) neighbor's bamboo cottage in front of the sea. the wind was blowing perfectly. i could hear the hypnotizing waves nearby.

i woke up and saw that the american (or swiss) neighbor arrived, but i just pretended to be asleep. surely he wouldn't mind that i was sleeping in his cottage. he didn't shoo me away. he just went inside his house. i went back to my siesta.

when i opened my eyes again, i saw that the sea water is slowly creeping towards the land, like that tsunami video i watched. i thought, "this can't be good," and ran to our house where lola, wawin, and our house help were.

when i got there, the waves were already violently crashing to the exterior of our house. it was a wonder, a miracle, why the water never went inside the house, otherwise we'll be engulfed! we could just see wave after wave hit the house. we went aboard a boat - yes, a boat inside our house - as the water found its way inside, and was slowly, but violently, rising.

lola, wawin, and i navigated the boat like pro surfers. we fought every wave. outside, waves continue to slam our house. surprisingly, the waves were crystal clear, almost inviting, unlike the murky waves i've seen in tsunami videos.

when the waters calmed down a bit, we went upstairs. elevate, elevate! we thought we'll be safer there. the waves were still angry outside though. we were all thankful that our house was sturdy despite its age.

finally, the water went back to
the sea. we were resting when we received a news: my lolo pepe died due to heart attack. :( he was in a hospital and we have to go there despite the chaos outside.

we went outside the house. it was peaceful. no trace of tsunami. odd, we thought.

suddenly, we heard people screaming. they said there was fire everywhere. true enough, there was a big fire on the street coming toward us. we decided to run to the opposite direction but there was also fire there. we had no choice but to run to our house again.

"to the bathroom!" i told lola and wawin. we don't know where our house help was :( we locked ourselves in the bathroom. i can't remember if we prayed. then i blinked...

and i was back to my comfortable room in sg. no tsunami, no fire. just me and my comfort. i felt thankful.

dreams, why are you so weird? why are you so scary?

happy hours

we're establishing a tradition. we're being happy on fridays (if time permits) during friday happy hour. cast: kuya, april, cat. wow ang dami! :)))

we found a sweet spot at far east square. it's not crowded probably because the place is being renovated. plus there are a number of bars/restos offering happy hour promotion. akala mo naman manginginom ako :) e isang bote pa lang e nahihilo na ako! that's fine. i still want to participate hehehe.

another reason why we say tgif! :)

human shredder

my mami has this habit of tearing docs that have no use. on general cleaning days, you'll find her slumped on the floor, tediously tearing up paper waste or confidential docs. human paper shredder ang dating :) she said she does it for 2 reasons:

a. so nobody could reuse or steal any information from you. it might be a good idea to scatter the waste in separate garbage bins.
b. it's therapeutic. yes.

i never dared to ask if she wants a paper shredder as a gift because i know the answer. in fact, i have inherited (not deliberately) the habit. on general cleaning days, i also feel compelled to gather all paper waste, find a comfortable spot on the floor (it has to be on the floor, not on a sofa or bed), and tear each one into pieces. i love the sound of paper being torn and i love the sight of the heap of shredded paper.

last sunday, i started cleaning my room in preparation for the move. look at my art work/therapy! love it!

indeed, i am my mother's daughter!